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"Bad things do happen; how I respond to them defines my character and the quality of my life. I can choose to sit in perpetual sadness, immobilized by the gravity of my loss, or I can choose to rise from the pain and treasure the most precious gift I have - life itself." - Walter Anderson


I'm not talking about the brain numbing, impossible to comprehend loss of a child or mate. That loss is too difficult to contemplate, and thankfully I have not experienced it. Somehow the ones left behind are expected to go on and recover from it, but I know not how.

I'm talking about the bad enough, life-changing loss of a parent, sibling, or a dear friend. This kind of loss leaves a hole that can be covered over, but remains empty underneath forever. I find that lately I even mourn people I don't know who have left this earth. I read their names and see their faces. It says they left a wife or husband, two or three children, and four or five grandchildren. I can picture their life. I can see how hard they worked for their family and how they tried to make their life count for something. How they tried to make a difference in this world. I know how difficult it is for their family. I can feel their loss as if it were mine.

I've lost so many dear ones in my life; my parents, my two sisters, close relatives (nieces, nephews, aunts, cousins and special friends). I feel them guiding me and their presence is always with me. But the pain of them not being here stays within me. I never stop missing them or wishing I could see their faces or hear their voices.

As we enter this third age, we are unfortunately on a first name basis with loss. We have to look at it in a whole new way because our friends are beginning to leave us. Someone said, "They are calling up our class" Maybe that's true. I look at the rocks on the sand and reach out to them for their strength. I'd like to think they are leaving this existence to go to the next plain. A plain we don't know about, but we can imagine any way we like. I imagine it to be beautiful with people we love waiting for us. That's what I think. That's what I choose to believe.

And that's what gets me through!


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Beverlye - Great story and it is a very similar way in which I think. The uncertainty about life is that we never know when it is going to end. I try to live each day to it fullest and as my friend Michael Weiner taught me, we should all try to find joy, beauty, and meaning in every day. Thanks for all the stories you have shared with us this year. You are in my thoughts and prayers and I wish you and your family a happy and healtheo 2014.

Dec 26, 2013 - 6:52 PM by David D

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